My missus is a first class tit

What a start to the day I'm out in my jimjams and dressing gown this morning cleaning the car off costhe missus needs it. She comes out and locks front door of house. The cars facing the wrong way so she says im gonns do a three point turn here. Ok I says. As she comes to the end of her three point turn I suddenly realise I aint got a key to get back in the house. So there I am in me Jim Jams Dressing Gown and leaky wellies waving like f**k at her with both hands, she waves back and starts to drive off (silly f*cking bitch ), I'm still there waving with both hands waving as she drives away and flashes bye to me with her hazard lights . I only had to walk all the way through the village in me Jim Jams, dressing gown and wellies to get a key to my house from my daughter who turns out is still in bed . Good job there was no men in white coats around She eventually comes downstairs and says what u doing out in yer Jim Jams dad, you need locking up you silly barstard. Well I got my key, I froze my nutz off walking back home and here I am. What else could go wrong after that?

What a start to the day I'm out in my jimjams and dressing gown this morning cleaning the car off costhe missus needs it. She comes out and locks front door of house. The cars facing the wrong way so she says im gonns do a three point turn here. Ok I says. As she comes to the end of her three point turn I suddenly realise I aint got a key to get back in the house. So there I am in me Jim Jams Dressing Gown and leaky wellies waving like f**k at her with both hands, she waves back and starts to drive off (silly f*cking bitch ), I'm still there waving with both hands waving as she drives away and flashes bye to me with her hazard lights . I only had to walk all the way through the village in me Jim Jams, dressing gown and wellies to get a key to my house from my daughter who turns out is still in bed . Good job there was no men in white coats around She eventually comes downstairs and says what u doing out in yer Jim Jams dad, you need locking up you silly barstard. Well I got my key, I froze my nutz off walking back home and here I am. What else could go wrong after that?

Youve Cheered My Day up already

Sod it Im gonna go back to bed and get out the other side, see if me luck changes

What a start to the day I'm out in my jimjams and dressing gown this morning cleaning the car off costhe missus needs it. She comes out and locks front door of house. The cars facing the wrong way so she says im gonns do a three point turn here. Ok I says. As she comes to the end of her three point turn I suddenly realise I aint got a key to get back in the house. So there I am in me Jim Jams Dressing Gown and leaky wellies waving like f**k at her with both hands, she waves back and starts to drive off (silly f*cking bitch ), I'm still there waving with both hands waving as she drives away and flashes bye to me with her hazard lights . I only had to walk all the way through the village in me Jim Jams, dressing gown and wellies to get a key to my house from my daughter who turns out is still in bed . Good job there was no men in white coats around She eventually comes downstairs and says what u doing out in yer Jim Jams dad, you need locking up you silly barstard. Well I got my key, I froze my nutz off walking back home and here I am. What else could go wrong after that?

Youve Cheered My Day up already

Me too!!

Sorry that is funny, it's what you get for being so kind to your wife and preparing her car. It couldn't happen in August, could it, when the weather is slighty milder.

DAUGHTER WAS WORKING BEHIND THE BAR LAST WEEK
Now where we live the snows terrible compared to others so we were keeping an eye on the snow so to speak
Our living rooms on the back with views over fields so you cant see as theres no light..
EVERY 10 MINS THE MRS KEPT GOING TO LOOK....
Now me having made a home made ruby nipped to the bog to do the deed never thinking anything untoward was about to happen........

Probably half an hr later I hear her shouting you stupid b@stard !!
Put the f@@king seat down!!!!!


In she walks with her new xmas slipper dripping wet and face like thunder
How was I supposed to know she was standin on the bog seat to look out of the window at the snow

ME BEING JUST A MALE WOULD NORMALLY VIEW FROM THE BEDROOM WINDOW AND WOULD CERTAINLY PUT THE LIGHT ON IF IT WAS DARK

WOMEN....dont yu just love em
A LAUGH A MINUTE

DAUGHTER WAS WORKING BEHIND THE BAR LAST WEEK
Now where we live the snows terrible compared to others so we were keeping an eye on the snow so to speak
Our living rooms on the back with views over fields so you cant see as theres no light..
EVERY 10 MINS THE MRS KEPT GOING TO LOOK....
Now me having made a home made ruby nipped to the bog to do the deed never thinking anything untoward was about to happen........

Probably half an hr later I hear her shouting you stupid b@stard !!
Put the f@@king seat down!!!!!


In she walks with her new xmas slipper dripping wet and face like thunder
How was I supposed to know she was standin on the bog seat to look out of the window at the snow

ME BEING JUST A MALE WOULD NORMALLY VIEW FROM THE BEDROOM WINDOW AND WOULD CERTAINLY PUT THE LIGHT ON IF IT WAS DARK

WOMEN....dont yu just love em
A LAUGH A MINUTE

Their all thick as mince but wecouldnt do without them butt could we? lol

What a start to the day I'm out in my jimjams and dressing gown this morning cleaning the car off costhe missus needs it. She comes out and locks front door of house. The cars facing the wrong way so she says im gonns do a three point turn here. Ok I says. As she comes to the end of her three point turn I suddenly realise I aint got a key to get back in the house. So there I am in me Jim Jams Dressing Gown and leaky wellies waving like f**k at her with both hands, she waves back and starts to drive off (silly f*cking bitch ), I'm still there waving with both hands waving as she drives away and flashes bye to me with her hazard lights . I only had to walk all the way through the village in me Jim Jams, dressing gown and wellies to get a key to my house from my daughter who turns out is still in bed . Good job there was no men in white coats around She eventually comes downstairs and says what u doing out in yer Jim Jams dad, you need locking up you silly barstard. Well I got my key, I froze my nutz off walking back home and here I am. What else could go wrong after that?

quality have a good day.

What a start to the day I'm out in my jimjams and dressing gown this morning cleaning the car off costhe missus needs it. She comes out and locks front door of house. The cars facing the wrong way so she says im gonns do a three point turn here. Ok I says. As she comes to the end of her three point turn I suddenly realise I aint got a key to get back in the house. So there I am in me Jim Jams Dressing Gown and leaky wellies waving like f**k at her with both hands, she waves back and starts to drive off (silly f*cking bitch ), I'm still there waving with both hands waving as she drives away and flashes bye to me with her hazard lights . I only had to walk all the way through the village in me Jim Jams, dressing gown and wellies to get a key to my house from my daughter who turns out is still in bed . Good job there was no men in white coats around She eventually comes downstairs and says what u doing out in yer Jim Jams dad, you need locking up you silly barstard. Well I got my key, I froze my nutz off walking back home and here I am. What else could go wrong after that?

the silly cow but you know when she gets back and finds out what happened it will somehow be YOUR fault

What a start to the day I'm out in my jimjams and dressing gown this morning cleaning the car off costhe missus needs it. She comes out and locks front door of house. The cars facing the wrong way so she says im gonns do a three point turn here. Ok I says. As she comes to the end of her three point turn I suddenly realise I aint got a key to get back in the house. So there I am in me Jim Jams Dressing Gown and leaky wellies waving like f**k at her with both hands, she waves back and starts to drive off (silly f*cking bitch ), I'm still there waving with both hands waving as she drives away and flashes bye to me with her hazard lights . I only had to walk all the way through the village in me Jim Jams, dressing gown and wellies to get a key to my house from my daughter who turns out is still in bed . Good job there was no men in white coats around She eventually comes downstairs and says what u doing out in yer Jim Jams dad, you need locking up you silly barstard. Well I got my key, I froze my nutz off walking back home and here I am. What else could go wrong after that?

Youve Cheered My Day up already

and me

DAUGHTER WAS WORKING BEHIND THE BAR LAST WEEK
Now where we live the snows terrible compared to others so we were keeping an eye on the snow so to speak
Our living rooms on the back with views over fields so you cant see as theres no light..
EVERY 10 MINS THE MRS KEPT GOING TO LOOK....
Now me having made a home made ruby nipped to the bog to do the deed never thinking anything untoward was about to happen........

Probably half an hr later I hear her shouting you stupid b@stard !!
Put the f@@king seat down!!!!!


In she walks with her new xmas slipper dripping wet and face like thunder
How was I supposed to know she was standin on the bog seat to look out of the window at the snow

ME BEING JUST A MALE WOULD NORMALLY VIEW FROM THE BEDROOM WINDOW AND WOULD CERTAINLY PUT THE LIGHT ON IF IT WAS DARK

WOMEN....dont yu just love em
A LAUGH A MINUTE

No offence but you completely lost me there.

Maybe you should have waived the e mail from TG she might have taken a bit more notice

Maybe you should have waived the e mail from TG she might have taken a bit more notice

Why should she no bugger at the Muni did. Can't say I didn't warn you all