Mon Jul 04, 2011 5:50 pm
Mon Jul 04, 2011 5:56 pm
BigGwynram wrote:I must admit to creating my own problems a lot of the time, i am known for telling the odd joke and trying to make a funny story out of the most dire situations on many occasions. This can backfire and when I do genuinely have some bad news to pass on the normal reaction is "and yes, what's the punchline" a bit embarrassing when you are trying to tell someone that Bob or Bill has just died and they wont take you seriously.
Well anyway, twenty minutes ago I was doing my MAN stuff and cleaning the roof of my caravan whilst standing on the top step of my 6ft aluminium step ladder,well you know how it goes "rather than get down and move the ladder I'll just reach out another extra six inches just like Mr f*cking gadget does on the telly.
Well as you might have guest, whoosh 56 year old 22 stone man flying through space,land on both elbows with leg wrapped around the top step of ladder, yes Some of you will know I was a judo expert back in the day, and I should know how to land, but I never got thrown whilst wrapped around a step ladder in any of my competitions, so this was a new and painful experience, the noise woke three people up in the Treharris cemetery, but it didn't disturb my good wife who was on the phone to her mum with the front door wide open.
I thought for a split second she'll come out now and untangle me, but to no avail, instead I had to untangle myself, struggle up on to my feet and almost crawl into my house looking for sympathy, I shouted from the doorway "Al, I just had a hell of a fall off the step ladder" I could hear her then saying to her mother "oh, It's only him messing around again, well after she noticed the blood dripping on her shiny floor and the pale pained expression did she actually decide to say to her mother " perhaps I'd better take a look and I'll ring you later".
So to all my friends out there ( I must still have some) if you don't see me post on here at least once every three days or so, please call around or ring to see if I'm OK, because I may be laying dead in my bed for days and she'll be thinking I'm doing it for a laugh (travel expenses will be reimbursed from my will) thank you and good night.
Mon Jul 04, 2011 5:57 pm
Mon Jul 04, 2011 5:58 pm
Mon Jul 04, 2011 5:59 pm
corky wrote::D
I will pop over now lol
Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:00 pm
Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:10 pm
Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:18 pm
Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:23 pm
Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:32 pm
Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:33 pm
Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:36 pm
Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:40 pm
electricblue wrote:EARTHQUAKE ROCKS TREHARRIS
A major earthquake measuring 5.8 on the Richter Scale hit in the early hours of yesterday morning, with the epicentre in QUAKERS YARD.
The earthquake decimated the area causing approximately £15.89 worth of damage.
Several priceless collections of mementos from the BOYS CLUB and the welfare Hall were damaged beyond repair.
Three areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed.
Many locals were woken well before their welfare cheques arrived. one resident - Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 5 said "It was such a shock, my little Chardonnay Mercedes came running into my bedroom crying.
My youngest two, Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm slept through it all. I was still shaking when I was watching Jerry Springer the next morning".
Apparently though, looting, muggings and car crime carried on as normal.
The Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Vegemite and 70,000 bottles of Home Brew to the area to help the stricken locals.
Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings, which include benefit books,lonsdale T-shirts, fake car tax discs and blue disable badges,
jewellery from Peacocks and antique pine furniture from Daya.
HOW YOU CAN HELP
This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing, parcels for those unfortunate to be caught up in this disaster. Clothing is most sought after.
Items most needed include: baseball caps, flannelette shirts, thongs and Lonsdale tracksuits.
Food parcels may be harder to come by, but are needed all the same.
Required foodstuffs include,Monster Munch (pickled onion flavor), McDonalds, KFC, ice cream and cans of White Lightning or Bacardi Breezers.
If you would prefer to donate money, 25p buys a biro for filling in
compensation forms; £10.00 buys chips, battered fish, crisps and fizzy drinks for a family of 9; £5.00 will pay for a packet of Lambertbutler and a lighter to calm the nerves of those affected.
PLEASE do not send tents for shelter, as the sight of posh housing is unfair on the population of the neighbouring areas
Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:40 pm
electricblue wrote:EARTHQUAKE ROCKS TREHARRIS
A major earthquake measuring 5.8 on the Richter Scale hit in the early hours of yesterday morning, with the epicentre in QUAKERS YARD.
The earthquake decimated the area causing approximately £15.89 worth of damage.
Several priceless collections of mementos from the BOYS CLUB and the welfare Hall were damaged beyond repair.
Three areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed.
Many locals were woken well before their welfare cheques arrived. one resident - Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 5 said "It was such a shock, my little Chardonnay Mercedes came running into my bedroom crying.
My youngest two, Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm slept through it all. I was still shaking when I was watching Jerry Springer the next morning".
Apparently though, looting, muggings and car crime carried on as normal.
The Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Vegemite and 70,000 bottles of Home Brew to the area to help the stricken locals.
Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings, which include benefit books,lonsdale T-shirts, fake car tax discs and blue disable badges,
jewellery from Peacocks and antique pine furniture from Daya.
HOW YOU CAN HELP
This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing, parcels for those unfortunate to be caught up in this disaster. Clothing is most sought after.
Items most needed include: baseball caps, flannelette shirts, thongs and Lonsdale tracksuits.
Food parcels may be harder to come by, but are needed all the same.
Required foodstuffs include,Monster Munch (pickled onion flavor), McDonalds, KFC, ice cream and cans of White Lightning or Bacardi Breezers.
If you would prefer to donate money, 25p buys a biro for filling in
compensation forms; £10.00 buys chips, battered fish, crisps and fizzy drinks for a family of 9; £5.00 will pay for a packet of Lambertbutler and a lighter to calm the nerves of those affected.
PLEASE do not send tents for shelter, as the sight of posh housing is unfair on the population of the neighbouring areas
Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:50 pm
Mon Jul 04, 2011 7:47 pm
Mon Jul 04, 2011 8:09 pm
Mon Jul 04, 2011 8:21 pm
Mon Jul 04, 2011 8:21 pm
Mon Jul 04, 2011 8:38 pm