"ENGLAND JOKES"

i asked fabio capello if he,ll go 4-4-2 tonight he said "no i think we,ll go 7-4-7 its bigger and has more legroom "!!!!!

just been announced that the england team will fly back to glasgow to get a heros welcome !!!!

whats big red and goes beep,beep beep.......englands victory parade bus reversing back in to the garage !!

I'm sure there'll be many more to come aswell!

whats the difference between england and aids
aids will still be in s.africa 2moz



james cordon n dizzie rascal r releasing a new single to follow up the world cup song.
SHOUT SHOUT ENGLAND ARE OUT

Post a reply

First unread post • 1 post • Page 1 of 1
do you think?
by ninianblue » Sun Jun 27, 2010 7:46 pm

engerland will have a open top bus,,,,

Post a reply

1 post • Page 1 of 1
God was not listening, so..
by Uncle Fester » Sun Jun 27, 2010 6:45 pm

Our father who leads our lions,Capello ruined our name,Our
time has come,we were undone In Africa as it..was
at most finals..Give us this day our team is dead And forgive
us our performances,As we forgive those who played better than us
and lead us into the airport and deliver us back from the world Cup ,For
England is the laughing stock we have no power or glory for ever and ever,Amen
COME ON ENGLAND!...You done it again.

Uncle Fester

Posts: 946
Joined: Tue Nov 24, 2009 10:14 pm
Top

Why Capello Brought On Heskey at 3-1 Down!
by Overthemoon » Sun Jun 27, 2010 5:54 pm

His mind was still clouded, after being tortured for more than a minute, only 2 hours before kick off!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B2gsvG95 ... re=related



Overthemoon

Posts: 80
Joined: Thu Jun 10, 2010 10:22 am
Top
Re: Why Capello Brought On Heskey at 3-1 Down!
by ninianblue » Sun Jun 27, 2010 7:43 pm

heskey is a hold up player, 2-0 up with 10 min to go, when your 4-1 down you need players who can attack,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, mmmm, but who can you bring on,?
ninianblue

Posts: 410
Joined: Thu Nov 26, 2009 11:00 pm
Location: cardiff

Post a reply

First unread post • 1 post • Page 1 of 1
this will be forgotten in 2 weeks?
by ninianblue » Sun Jun 27, 2010 7:52 pm

ready for the euros, and engerland are the best team in the world, and rooney,is this and that, gerard the best midfielder in the world, blah ,blah ,blah,,
ninianblue

Posts: 410
Joined: Thu Nov 26, 2009 11:00 pm
Location: cardiff

Wayne Bridge must be having a little chuckle to himself
Post a reply

First unread post • 3 posts • Page 1 of 1
Wayne Bridge must be having a little chuckle to himself
by ihatealiens » Sun Jun 27, 2010 6:10 pm



ihatealiens

Posts: 2552
Joined: Tue Nov 24, 2009 7:23 pm
Top
Re: Wayne Bridge must be having a little chuckle to himself
by Blazing Saddles » Sun Jun 27, 2010 6:11 pm

ihatealiens wrote:



I bet he had his todger out when the 4th goal went in!!

Blazing Saddles

Posts: 1326
Joined: Mon Dec 07, 2009 9:40 pm
Top
Re: Wayne Bridge must be having a little chuckle to himself
by Lawnmower » Sun Jun 27, 2010 6:13 pm

Blazing Saddles wrote:
ihatealiens wrote:



I bet he had his todger out when the 4th goal went in!!


If there is any justice it was inside John Terry's missus.
Lawnmower

Posts: 1330
Joined: Tue Nov 24, 2009 7:39 pm
Top

heres the biggest joke...................................1930 - Did not enter
1934 - Did not enter
1938 - Did not enter
1950 - Did not qualify
1954 - Did not qualify
1958 - Beaten quarter finalists
1962 - Did not qualify
1966 - Did not qualify
1970 - Did not qualify
1974 - Did not qualify
1978 - Did not qualify
1982 - Did not qualify
1986 - Did not qualify
1990 - Did not qualify
1994 - Did not qualify
1998 - Did not qualify
2002 - Did not qualify
2006 - Did not qualify
2010 - Did not qualify
Roll on 2014........................................what a record

heres the biggest joke...................................1930 - Did not enter
1934 - Did not enter
1938 - Did not enter
1950 - Did not qualify
1954 - Did not qualify
1958 - Beaten quarter finalists
1962 - Did not qualify
1966 - Did not qualify
1970 - Did not qualify
1974 - Did not qualify
1978 - Did not qualify
1982 - Did not qualify
1986 - Did not qualify
1990 - Did not qualify
1994 - Did not qualify
1998 - Did not qualify
2002 - Did not qualify
2006 - Did not qualify
2010 - Did not qualify
Roll on 2014........................................what a record

With a population of less than the size of Birmingham I think we (Wales) do rather well. How far do you think England would get with players only coming from those born in Brum?

Besides, England get a stage further than us (they qualified) and their best result is a 1-0 against Solvenia FFS.

34321_404030089156_668104156_4480154_6908346_n.jpg

You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.

34321_404030089156_668104156_4480154_6908346_n.jpg

whats the difference between england and a tea bag?
a tea bag stays in the cup longer!

heres the biggest joke...................................1930 - Did not enter
1934 - Did not enter
1938 - Did not enter
1950 - Did not qualify
1954 - Did not qualify
1958 - Beaten quarter finalists
1962 - Did not qualify
1966 - Did not qualify
1970 - Did not qualify
1974 - Did not qualify
1978 - Did not qualify
1982 - Did not qualify
1986 - Did not qualify
1990 - Did not qualify
1994 - Did not qualify
1998 - Did not qualify
2002 - Did not qualify
2006 - Did not qualify
2010 - Did not qualify
Roll on 2014........................................what a record

Here is a bigger joke - the England football supporter.

Very bad loser and terrible winner also.

Think they are going to win it every 4 years only to play a decent team and get beaten and sulk for 4 years.

Joke for the day
by tangledupinblue » Sun Jun 27, 2010 9:55 pm

The England football team are going to change the emblem on their shirts. The Three Lions will now become three tampons to celebrate their worst ******* period in history

tangledupinblue

Posts: 70
Joined: Tue Dec 01, 2009 7:10 pm

Post a reply

4 posts • Page 1 of 1
What happened to the post I made
by Uncle Fester » Sun Jun 27, 2010 9:54 pm

with a prayer in it? I just did a search for my posts and its gone??

Uncle Fester

Posts: 951
Joined: Tue Nov 24, 2009 10:14 pm
Top
Re: What happened to the post I made
by Overthemoon » Sun Jun 27, 2010 10:00 pm

If it was to do with a joke about England, it probably ended up in this thread!

viewtopic.php?f=2&t=16517

Which is where this post

viewtopic.php?f=2&t=16553

will end up when Annis sees it!

Overthemoon

Posts: 82
Joined: Thu Jun 10, 2010 10:22 am
Top
Re: What happened to the post I made
by Uncle Fester » Sun Jun 27, 2010 10:06 pm

Overthemoon wrote:
If it was to do with a joke about England, it probably ended up in this thread!

viewtopic.php?f=2&t=16517

Which is where this post

viewtopic.php?f=2&t=16553

will end up when Annis sees it!


Thats it, cheers fella, I thought I was cracking up!

Uncle Fester

Posts: 951
Joined: Tue Nov 24, 2009 10:14 pm
Top
Re: What happened to the post I made
by Forever Blue » Sun Jun 27, 2010 10:40 pm

Overthemoon wrote:
If it was to do with a joke about England, it probably ended up in this thread!

viewtopic.php?f=2&t=16517

Which is where this post

viewtopic.php?f=2&t=16553

will end up when Annis sees it!

Joke for the day
by tangledupinblue » Sun Jun 27, 2010 9:55 pm

The England football team are going to change the emblem on their shirts. The Three Lions will now become three tampons to celebrate their worst ******* period in history

tangledupinblue

Posts: 70
Joined: Tue Dec 01, 2009 7:10 pm

Substituting Defoe for Heskey when you need goals?

That's like switching off the porn when you fancy a wank.

heres the biggest joke...................................1930 - Did not enter
1934 - Did not enter
1938 - Did not enter
1950 - Did not qualify
1954 - Did not qualify
1958 - Beaten quarter finalists
1962 - Did not qualify
1966 - Did not qualify
1970 - Did not qualify
1974 - Did not qualify
1978 - Did not qualify
1982 - Did not qualify
1986 - Did not qualify
1990 - Did not qualify
1994 - Did not qualify
1998 - Did not qualify
2002 - Did not qualify
2006 - Did not qualify
2010 - Did not qualify
Roll on 2014........................................what a record

Here is a bigger joke - the England football supporter.

Very bad loser and terrible winner also.

Think they are going to win it every 4 years only to play a decent team and get beaten and sulk for 4 years.

can dish it out but cant take it eh

heres the biggest joke...................................1930 - Did not enter
1934 - Did not enter
1938 - Did not enter
1950 - Did not qualify
1954 - Did not qualify
1958 - Beaten quarter finalists
1962 - Did not qualify
1966 - Did not qualify
1970 - Did not qualify
1974 - Did not qualify
1978 - Did not qualify
1982 - Did not qualify
1986 - Did not qualify
1990 - Did not qualify
1994 - Did not qualify
1998 - Did not qualify
2002 - Did not qualify
2006 - Did not qualify
2010 - Did not qualify
Roll on 2014........................................what a record

Here is a bigger joke - the England football supporter.

Very bad loser and terrible winner also.

Think they are going to win it every 4 years only to play a decent team and get beaten and sulk for 4 years.

can dish it out but cant take it eh

exactly. don't dish it out if you cannot take it.

a mate just said to me,rooney was hungry.......for a pork pie.

Warning serious danger of flooding in England tonight................................... From Welsh and Scottish fans pissing themselves laughing

heres the biggest joke...................................1930 - Did not enter
1934 - Did not enter
1938 - Did not enter
1950 - Did not qualify
1954 - Did not qualify
1958 - Beaten quarter finalists
1962 - Did not qualify
1966 - Did not qualify
1970 - Did not qualify
1974 - Did not qualify
1978 - Did not qualify
1982 - Did not qualify
1986 - Did not qualify
1990 - Did not qualify
1994 - Did not qualify
1998 - Did not qualify
2002 - Did not qualify
2006 - Did not qualify
2010 - Did not qualify
Roll on 2014........................................what a record

Here is a bigger joke - the England football supporter.

Very bad loser and terrible winner also.

Think they are going to win it every 4 years only to play a decent team and get beaten and sulk for 4 years.

can dish it out but cant take it eh

Rob, if you are short of takers I'll take it all day. Yes England are better then Wales. but if we'd been in the special needs group that you were in then we would have finished 2nd as well. And we could have laid down to the German's just as badly.

Never mind son, ask your grandpa to sit you on his knee and tell you of the time (the only time) England won a f*cking cup.

outsider. 1- please dont call me "son" im probably older than you.
2-i work with people with "special needs" as you so eloquently put it, so i take offense at that .
3-i cant ask my grandfather as he was executed in a prison of war camp by the germans .

England will return to a hero's welcome on Monday when their plane lands at Glasgow Airport

England will return to a hero's welcome on Monday when their plane lands at Glasgow Airport

outsider. 1- please dont call me "son" im probably older than you.
2-i work with people with "special needs" as you so eloquently put it, so i take offense at that .
3-i cant ask my grandfather as he was executed in a prison of war camp by the germans .

Shite that put a dampner on my evening but well said Rob

i got a good joke. Bringing emile heskey on when you are losing 3-1 with 25mins to go and you need to score


surely you bring crouch and lennon on? and take some1 like glen johnson off and go for the goals?:ayatollah:

i got a good joke. Bringing emile heskey on when you are losing 3-1 with 25mins to go and you need to score


surely you bring crouch and lennon on? and take some1 like glen johnson off and go for the goals?:ayatollah:

You would think so but eh its England

oxo are bringing out a new cube to celebrate england in the world cup; with white foil and a red cross...it's going to be called "laughing stock"

all england games will be moved to the gay adult channel in the near future, as the sight off 11 arseholes being hammered by a bunch of young boyish Germans, repeatedly for 90 mins will be too explict for regular television...