me and my husband

had fantastic sex with a turkish waiter in bodrum last night any one know if there is a turkish resturaunt in cardiff as i think my husband would like to try it again.

Is that what you call Turkish Delight

Is that what you call Turkish Delight

..... most defonate memet was built like a stalion.

Welcome back Mrs Ramsgate, glad you enjoyed the sex. Regarding Turkish restraunts theres one in Canton (don`t know name) and suprisingly enough one opened last week in Trebanog called A Taste of Turkey. Myself & Baz have been there already, the food is terrible but they have a wonderful turkish belly dancer called Miss Tracey Hooker, shes devine.

Well worth a visit.

JBBJ

Welcome back Mrs Ramsgate, glad you enjoyed the sex. Regarding Turkish restraunts theres one in Canton (don`t know name) and suprisingly enough one opened last week in Trebanog called A Taste of Turkey. Myself & Baz have been there already, the food is terrible but they have a wonderful turkish belly dancer called Miss Tracey Hooker, shes devine.

Well worth a visit.

JBBJ

/////// thank you jbbj me and harry will have to go there next weekend harry used to live in trebanog in the 40s and has fond memorys of the place . memit the waiter who made love to me and harry said he would like to come to wales for a few weeks , do you think baz would let him stat with him for a week as i have to go to hereford strawberry picking for a week,

Perfect timing Rose, Baz is on holidays Harry could stay there, freeing you up for the strawberry picking season. Memet sounds sensational, could you possibly get him living with you in Ireland as your second husband ? Under Irish law this is legal, so it may be worth considering.

I don`t know when you got back home, but that animal Lucas as been up to his old tricks again, strangling poor Denise in the holy fathers name, it makes me feel ashamed of myself, that I took this b*stard of a man under my roof, fed him clothed him and paid his bail money. Never again Rose.

Did you find Turkey cold for this time of year ? Brian and Ned Morgan went back in May and they both came back with frostbite. Portugal was allright, but a bit to common for me, I `ll be going back to Morecombe in the future, we`ve had wonderful holidays there. I am glad your back as I need some advice on one of my prize winning jersey cows, she`s developed a bad case of mastitus in one of her udders, I have had two vets out but they have`nt got a clue. Perhaps you could have a think about it, and let me know tomorrow.

I have to go now, theres a rogue fox about which is worrying the life out of my light sussex bantams.

JBBJ

,,,,, hi jbbj dont worry about your problem with mastitas in your aberdeen angus dairy herd as it is very easy to remady i always recomend a book that was written by a master in the art of cureing mastitas in cows ( mr dean newtons , mastitas remades for begginers ) one of his most used remidies is to keep the herd away from any sort of vegertation for up to 10 days as this will relax them, cows can go with out any sort of food for up to six months so dont worry about this part of the cure . after the tenth day you may give them a light salad in the morning followed by a spoon full of cod liver oil let the food settle and you can start on your treatment . take the infected udder in the palm of your hand and gentty caress you will see the vaines exspand 4 times larger than normal then you need to clean the teat out with a cotton bud apply a small cream on the cotton bud called oynixse tube 4 , be careful not to get it in your eyes as it causes blindness and cold saws repeat six times a day and your herd will be mastitas free within a few weeks . good luck with this jbbj if you need a hand with this please dont hesertate to ring.

Mrs Ramsgate you dirty slut, baz has disapeared from here was hoping to come to dublin! aslong as you supply the lube yar rotter

Mrs Ramsgate you dirty slut, baz has disapeared from here was hoping to come to dublin! aslong as you supply the lube yar rotter

,,,,, ben i think baz is on a secret mission for the fbi im sure he will be back soon.

,,,,, hi jbbj dont worry about your problem with mastitas in your aberdeen angus dairy herd as it is very easy to remady i always recomend a book that was written by a master in the art of cureing mastitas in cows ( mr dean newtons , mastitas remades for begginers ) one of his most used remidies is to keep the herd away from any sort of vegertation for up to 10 days as this will relax them, cows can go with out any sort of food for up to six months so dont worry about this part of the cure . after the tenth day you may give them a light salad in the morning followed by a spoon full of cod liver oil let the food settle and you can start on your treatment . take the infected udder in the palm of your hand and gentty caress you will see the vaines exspand 4 times larger than normal then you need to clean the teat out with a cotton bud apply a small cream on the cotton bud called oynixse tube 4 , be careful not to get it in your eyes as it causes blindness and cold saws repeat six times a day and your herd will be mastitas free within a few weeks . good luck with this jbbj if you need a hand with this please dont hesertate to ring.

Ramsgate you b*stard I am blind I can`t see, and I have 13 cold sores on my teats, my receptionist Miss Tibbs is typing this due to my blindness, I can only imagine how blind Wayne & Ellis used to feel. This lack of eyesights a right bugger.

JBBJ

,,,,, hi jbbj dont worry about your problem with mastitas in your aberdeen angus dairy herd as it is very easy to remady i always recomend a book that was written by a master in the art of cureing mastitas in cows ( mr dean newtons , mastitas remades for begginers ) one of his most used remidies is to keep the herd away from any sort of vegertation for up to 10 days as this will relax them, cows can go with out any sort of food for up to six months so dont worry about this part of the cure . after the tenth day you may give them a light salad in the morning followed by a spoon full of cod liver oil let the food settle and you can start on your treatment . take the infected udder in the palm of your hand and gentty caress you will see the vaines exspand 4 times larger than normal then you need to clean the teat out with a cotton bud apply a small cream on the cotton bud called oynixse tube 4 , be careful not to get it in your eyes as it causes blindness and cold saws repeat six times a day and your herd will be mastitas free within a few weeks . good luck with this jbbj if you need a hand with this please dont hesertate to ring.

Ramsgate you b*stard I am blind I can`t see, and I have 13 cold sores on my teats, my receptionist Miss Tibbs is typing this due to my blindness, I can only imagine how blind Wayne & Ellis used to feel. This lack of eyesights a right bugger.

JBBJ

,,,,, i forgot about your blindness and cold saw problems/,,,,, there is another good book you might need to read (it is called, blindness and cold saw home remadys written by the right honrable nigel hocker.) most libarys should have this classic it was written before nigels brakedown . ...... i was talking to some old friends of yours last night in the eagle in ynyshir minty and julie halford thay seem to be a lot more approchable than normal as thay have finished the course for drug and alcahol adiction the both of them asked about you and said you are not to worry about what happend in the past and thay have forgoten about it . what do thay mean jbbj.

there is a turkish restaurant in the red dragon centre

had fantastic sex with a turkish waiter in bodrum last night any one know if there is a turkish resturaunt in cardiff as i think my husband would like to try it again.

Make a trip up to Aberdare. Plenty of kebab shops full of Turkish men. I gotta freen can of Pepsi last time I was in there! You may get lucky.......

Mrs Ramsgate you dirty slut, baz has disapeared from here was hoping to come to dublin! aslong as you supply the lube yar rotter

,,,,, ben i think baz is on a secret mission for the fbi im sure he will be back soon.

I heard Baz has gone to the 4th National Radish Appreciation Society Convention??

had fantastic sex with a turkish waiter in bodrum last night any one know if there is a turkish resturaunt in cardiff as i think my husband would like to try it again.

Mrs Ramsgate I must apologise for my abusive message form Friday night, but I was working undercover at the time with Gazza on the Raoul Moat business. Gazza was awesome, bringing Moat lager, a dressing gown, some chicken pieces and a fishing rod. Could you imagine Gary Linekar doing that ?

I followed your advice with Bluebell my jersey cow, and what excellent advice it was, she`s now running with the rest of the herd up by the water tanks. I did take the liberty of getting Pyscho Newton to have a quick look at her, and him and is assistant (a very effimanite man, with a perm and a suit on) named Tiger called down this afternoon to have a look at her, Pyscho said she was fine, but he needed to sing to her to fully cure her. He then sang at the top of his voice that old wartime classic song Run Rabbit Run to the cow, and threatened both me and Tiger with violence if we failed to join him on the chorus, so we all sang to her.

Fair play to Psycho he certainly knows is cattle, the funny thing was he refused any cash payments, but requested that I pay him with £255 worth of blackcurrant jam, which I did. Great to hear you bumped into Alford & Minty in the Eagle, I am still banned after that incident when Tadors speed knife went missing in 1985. I drink in the Fighting Blood these days, and I have got really friendly with three smashing chaps in there, Hitler Williams, Mansell Rowlands and a very tall gentleman who is known as Good Value. Its a pleasure to drink with them, their very reserved and theres never no embarassing scenes with them.

By the way I was having a drink with my brother Erasmussen last week, he as bought an old cottage near Cowbridge that he was renovating, but apparently the council as stopped all work because, a family of long eared bats have been found in the attic, and the council say they are a protected species. Knowing you have a keen interest in bats, and you once worked with bats in that circus act you had, do you know if their a protected species or not ? I know angora goats, marmasets and gazelles are protected species, but bats I can`t believe that at all.

Mrs R, I would also like to thank you, for your advice with my illness`s, I can now see again and the cold sores have gone.

JBBJ

Mrs Ramsgate you dirty slut, baz has disapeared from here was hoping to come to dublin! aslong as you supply the lube yar rotter

,,,,, ben i think baz is on a secret mission for the fbi im sure he will be back soon.

I heard Baz has gone to the 4th National Radish Appreciation Society Convention??

Claire the truth is now out, he spends two weeks every year, at this convention and as done since 1865.

Cheers

JBBJ

,,,,, hi jbbj dont worry about your problem with mastitas in your aberdeen angus dairy herd as it is very easy to remady i always recomend a book that was written by a master in the art of cureing mastitas in cows ( mr dean newtons , mastitas remades for begginers ) one of his most used remidies is to keep the herd away from any sort of vegertation for up to 10 days as this will relax them, cows can go with out any sort of food for up to six months so dont worry about this part of the cure . after the tenth day you may give them a light salad in the morning followed by a spoon full of cod liver oil let the food settle and you can start on your treatment . take the infected udder in the palm of your hand and gentty caress you will see the vaines exspand 4 times larger than normal then you need to clean the teat out with a cotton bud apply a small cream on the cotton bud called oynixse tube 4 , be careful not to get it in your eyes as it causes blindness and cold saws repeat six times a day and your herd will be mastitas free within a few weeks . good luck with this jbbj if you need a hand with this please dont hesertate to ring.

Ramsgate you b*stard I am blind I can`t see, and I have 13 cold sores on my teats, my receptionist Miss Tibbs is typing this due to my blindness, I can only imagine how blind Wayne & Ellis used to feel. This lack of eyesights a right bugger.

JBBJ

,,,,, i forgot about your blindness and cold saw problems/,,,,, there is another good book you might need to read (it is called, blindness and cold saw home remadys written by the right honrable nigel hocker.) most libarys should have this classic it was written before nigels brakedown . ...... i was talking to some old friends of yours last night in the eagle in ynyshir minty and julie halford thay seem to be a lot more approchable than normal as thay have finished the course for drug and alcahol adiction the both of them asked about you and said you are not to worry about what happend in the past and thay have forgoten about it . what do thay mean jbbj.

I should have told you about this at the time, but you had enough to deal with, as you were having your seventh hysterctomy. Its a complicated story. Myself Alford and Minty were arrested for importing prostitutes out of the Ukraine and getting them on the game, working in a brothel in Porth. Our headquarters was the Shaft cellar bar, Alford was the madam, I was the pimp and Minty was our minder. The operation was going smoothly and we were making some serious cash, until we upset a very notorious firm of local gangsters, brothers by the name of the Dennis & Ray Monkfield, who grassed us up to the old bill. In a very weak frame of mind and bearing in mind I am a cousin to Princess Micheal of Kent. I did a deal with the police and grassed up Alford & Minty, they got 7 and 11 years respectively. Its good to hear they have forgiven me, but I still can`t face them or Big Wayne Chivers, he was our driver and he got 4 years as well.

Thankfully now that I have my Islamic faith to follow, I can begin to live with my actions, but I can`t forget what I did to them. When they were inside Minty who did is time in Parkhurst developed an heroin addiction, and Alford (who i think shared a cell with Fred West`s wife Rose) developed an addiction to shaving foam. Thankfully their both okay now. I was only thinking the other day about Fred West, and how when we used to visit your Uncle Brian in Gloucester, we would all call around to Freds for a few pints of rough cider with him.

I have a message for you from Kosher & Johnny Belcher are you interseted in investing a few quid in their new rag & bone business. Their looking for about £30K, to purchase an horse and cart. I might go in for it myself, their two such astute businessmen what could possibly go wrong ?

JBBJ

jbbj;;;;;;;;;; you have been wheeling and dealing all your life and this sounds like a good deal to me 30k for a horse and cart . if the scrap prices go down you could use the horse and cart as a taxi service from mardy to porth station , as you know me and you have spent many a pleasant evining discussing why thay have never re opend the train service between mardy and porth you could make a fourtune your costs would be minemal 2 bales of straw a bag of pony cubes and some flea spray.i make that about £89.36 a week if you decide to go ahead with this i know a good blacksmith who will not rip you off with the shoding of your horse you will find him in the baden drinking with dick salter his name is johnny jenkings, he speaks a little bit fast , so you may need to take a translater with you ,

Mrs Ramsgate they have actually reopened this vital rail link, but it is an underground system and you have to be timelord or a warlock to use it. The scrap metal business is booming, I now have four wagons on the road, and three horse and carts. I honestly think now is the time for you to invest that £100k compensation money you had, for that unfortunate incident with Mel Gibson (gross indecency and sexual exploitation) into this type of business.

Had a postcard from Baz today, he really seems to be enjoying his holiday in Memphis, I did`nt know he was such a fanatical Elvis Presley fan.

Any news on the long eared bats yet ?

Hugs and kisses

JBBJ

yes there is good news on the long eared bat front , you are allowed to remove them from the said dwelong as long as you do it humainly your best bet would be to use baited traps which you can purches from any good mamal trap firm , i would recomend a metal cage baited with shreded wheat and butter beans , suspend the baited trap from the bell tower in your house leave over night and all the bats should have been caught , thats the easy part getting the bats out of the trap is the hard part , thay tend to get the ears rapped around the wire in the trap and it is inpossible to get the critters out so you need to get a bsa bantam 250cc disconect the spark plug and connect it to the cage kick start the bike and the eletric shock , in most cases gets the bats out of the trap . remember you need to realease them on a different contanant as thay will come back to rhoost in the same place ,........... by the way did you see that denise was pulled out of the canal in walford tonight . i dont like using bad language but that man is a compleat rotter , talk to you soon jbbj love rose,

Thanks for the advise regarding the bats, I will pass this on to Erasmussen. I cannot say to much at the moment, but the old bill are in my house searching for that evil creature Lucas, after Denise`s drowning. It was going alright but that silly sod Gazza as turned up in a taxi from Newcastle with a bible, two can of lager and a top hat. I will have to send him somewhere else, its embarrasing, perhaps Des Probate could take him in.

Exciting news tonight Mrs R, with Sam Hammam, the Riddler etc all having a meeting about our club. I wonder what their drinking, neat pints of pernod I expect.

Congatulations on passing your driving test.

JBBJ

Thanks for the advise regarding the bats, I will pass this on to Erasmussen. I cannot say to much at the moment, but the old bill are in my house searching for that evil creature Lucas, after Denise`s drowning. It was going alright but that silly sod Gazza as turned up in a taxi from Newcastle with a bible, two can of lager and a top hat. I will have to send him somewhere else, its embarrasing, perhaps Des Probate could take him in.

Exciting news tonight Mrs R, with Sam Hammam, the Riddler etc all having a meeting about our club. I wonder what their drinking, neat pints of pernod I expect.

Congatulations on passing your driving test.

JBBJ

........ thanks jbbj 14 th time lucky on the driving test yipeeeeeeeeee. sam hammam phoned me yesterday and said by the start of the season himself and baz will be back in charge (fantastic news) and the first sinings thay are going to make is christian ronaldo and dunga ( ynyshir) but ill be honest i dont think thay will get in the cardiff side , the new hunting season is nearly apon us are you doing your usual protestsat the councel offices,

oi oi saveloy !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Baz gets to do the painting at CCS

oi oi saveloy !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Baz gets to do the painting at CCS

,,,,,,,, you know baz martyn he is bound to get the coulers wrong.

Thanks for the advise regarding the bats, I will pass this on to Erasmussen. I cannot say to much at the moment, but the old bill are in my house searching for that evil creature Lucas, after Denise`s drowning. It was going alright but that silly sod Gazza as turned up in a taxi from Newcastle with a bible, two can of lager and a top hat. I will have to send him somewhere else, its embarrasing, perhaps Des Probate could take him in.

Exciting news tonight Mrs R, with Sam Hammam, the Riddler etc all having a meeting about our club. I wonder what their drinking, neat pints of pernod I expect.

Congatulations on passing your driving test.

JBBJ

........ thanks jbbj 14 th time lucky on the driving test yipeeeeeeeeee. sam hammam phoned me yesterday and said by the start of the season himself and baz will be back in charge (fantastic news) and the first sinings thay are going to make is christian ronaldo and dunga ( ynyshir) but ill be honest i dont think thay will get in the cardiff side , the new hunting season is nearly apon us are you doing your usual protestsat the councel offices,

Baz and Sam what a team, they will make. I will be leading the Rhondda Bring Back Fox Hunting march to the council offices this coming Wednesday. To demonstrate the quickness of the kill and the total lack of cruelty with fox hunting we will be letting five foxes loose in the council chambers, then we will send in a pack of an hundred hounds, six terriers and forty horses to flush them out. I am getting Ken Hoare to video it, so hopefully you can see it on youtube on Wednesday night. We have 600 protesters going on Wednesday led by Mad Frankie Fraser riding a piebald donkey, accompanied by a Japanese group much loved by Dai Arsenal and the late, great Johnny Harries called Acid Mothers Temple.

It should be a fantastic day, its a pity you cant get time off your work as an astronaut to come with us.

Speak Soon

JBBJ

i have had a word with the powers who b in nassa and i may be able to take wendsday off, as long as pluto and satern are not alined as we have a probe due to land there if that is the case . i am looking forward to your protest as you and your chums always put a good show on,. i was at the orange day parade yesterday past off without to many incedents but i lost the heel off one of my stilletos , do you know if alf is still fixing shoes these days and is he exspensive . i met up with philip brown , egg head and tinker in belfast last night thay where looking to buy a micolight airoplane as phil recones it is taking him far to long to go from ynyshir to porth every day to feed his pigones . he is earning a small fourtune now training homing pigeons for the army , i always new that man would be ok. any way i must go now i have an appointment with my solicetor to sort out my last will and testoment. talk later love rose.

Mrs Ramsgate, sorry you could not make our pro fox hunting demonstation today, it went really well 12 foxes killed, 2 councillors killed, 15 coppers injured and 38 arrests. A successfull day in all. I am really sorry to hear you lost one of your stilleto heels during the orange day parade. If you can find the heel, then Alf is indeed still in business, but he is not cheap.

Have you got it wrong when you said there was no trouble during the orange day parade, I read today, 55 coppers were injured, rubber bullets were fired and £1 million pounds worth of damage was caused

And all this to celebrate a type of fruit, bloody orange day parades, you don`t get this on banana day parades, or apricot day parades, these orange paraders are letting other fruit followers down. I go on the strawberry day parade every December 25th and you never get or see any trouble at all.

Phil Brown, for a total neandrathal badger baiter as done well for himself I agree with you, but you do know he made all his money from the child slave trade don`t you So he`s not a man I would trust.

JBBJ

Mrs Ramsgate, sorry you could not make our pro fox hunting demonstation today, it went really well 12 foxes killed, 2 councillors killed, 15 coppers injured and 38 arrests. A successfull day in all. I am really sorry to hear you lost one of your stilleto heels during the orange day parade. If you can find the heel, then Alf is indeed still in business, but he is not cheap.

Have you got it wrong when you said there was no trouble during the orange day parade, I read today, 55 coppers were injured, rubber bullets were fired and £1 million pounds worth of damage was caused

And all this to celebrate a type of fruit, bloody orange day parades, you don`t get this on banana day parades, or apricot day parades, these orange paraders are letting other fruit followers down. I go on the strawberry day parade every December 25th and you never get or see any trouble at all.

Phil Brown, for a total neandrathal badger baiter as done well for himself I agree with you, but you do know he made all his money from the child slave trade don`t you So he`s not a man I would trust.

JBBJ

.............................well well well phil brown in the slave trade now that is news to me i always thought there was some thing up the day i saw him on the jeramy kyle show with with his social worker taking lie detector tests to see who was the father of tinkers puppys.

....... as i told you yesterday i was at my solicitors documenting my last will and testoment, iv left you the appartment in argentina and 16 acers of scrub land in hamilton you can do with it as you will but i would recomend to sell the land to the scotish tourist board as thay would pay good money for it , iv had a tip off that thay want to put a theme park there called jimmy lloyds drink your self around the world ( drinks from all the countrys of the world) . it is being sponserd by an old mate of yours mr terry blenchorn . any way it is up to you what you do with the land.

........ my old engiish game birds escaped from the hen house today and i cant find them anywhere so i will have a sleepless night tonight worrying about them , i know it sounds daft but i love my chickins more than i love that tw*t of a husband of mine , do you think chickins have feelings i know it is one if them questions what came first the chickin or the egg but im sure you will have the answer

i still have your underwear darling