L.N.C

Morning folks, just in from work

What's the difference between a vibrator and a Swansea fan?




A vibrator isn't a real dick

good way to enter, that joke could mysteriously make an apperance as my facebook status

Happy to help lol

What do you think the Fritzl kids got their sister for mothers day?

i worry about you rob, but is does open her up to a few things...


thank god claire is not part of the LNC tonight

what else you got for us rob/ntb?

what you fancy?

im sure this is one of our members.

Paddy is sitting trying to catch fish through ice when he hears a loud booming voice say "THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE HERE"

"f**k me, be jesus holy Mary mother of christ, is that you youreslf there God?" says Paddy.

The voice booms back "NO YOU THICK IRISH c**t, IT'S THE f*cking ICE RINK MANAGER"

im sure this is one of our members.

its JAMCCFC met him at the march, his eyes freaked me out

the latest in piercings

Fucked that post up!

Last edited by PtB on Fri Mar 19, 2010 1:44 am, edited 1 time in total.

the latest in piercings

That's f*cking horrid!
Imagin getting yer dick caught on that - one to avoid monkeyfacing.

Wonder if her other lips are like that...

Last edited by PtB on Fri Mar 19, 2010 1:45 am, edited 1 time in total.

harold shipman is enjoying his last meal.....A CURRY!
when asked if he enjoyed it, he replied it was ok, but i could of murdered a nan!

micheal jackson and his wife are in the recovery room after the birth of there son. MJ asks the doctor how long til we can have sex??
doctor replies id wait until hes atleast 12

harold shipman is enjoying his last meal.....A CURRY!
when asked if he enjoyed it, he replied it was ok, but i could of murdered a nan!

guy says to a girl in a bar, want to play the magic game???
whats that she replies......???
you come back to mine, you f**k me then dissapear

When David Beckham scores, I drink BECKS
When Paul Scholes scores, I drink SKOL
When Kenny Miller scores, I drink MILLER




Thank f**k David Seaman was a goalkeeper

When David Beckham scores, I drink BECKS
When Paul Scholes scores, I drink SKOL
When Kenny Miller scores, I drink MILLER




Thank f**k David Seaman was a goalkeeper

works the other way if your a girl from newport. they used to hope and prey seaman would go up for corners

Little Johnny asks curiously, "What are you doing, Dad?"

His father quickly replies, "I thought I saw a mouse go underneath the bed."

Little Johnny replies, "What are you gonna do -- screw him?"

Q: What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?

A: Pull the pin and throw it back.

HOW DO DAVE JONES AND PETER CUNTSDALE CHANGE A LIGHT BULB????

THEY HOLD IT IN THE AIR AND THE WORLD REVOLVES AROUND THEM !!

Three men are given a wish each by a genie.
An Irish farmer, a Scotsman and an Englishman.
The Irishman wished for all the land in Ireland to be fertile forevermore.
In a flash, the genie does it.
The Englishman is amazed.
"I want a wall all around England so no-one can enter pur precious land" says the Englishman.
In a flash, a wall appears all around England, much to the joy of the Englishman.
The genie looks at the Scotsman.
"Tell me more about this wall" says the Scotsman.
The genie states "It's 500ft high and 500ft thick. NOTHING gets in and NOTHING gets out"
The Scotsman lights up a Hamlet and smiles..."Fill the fucker with water!!!"

How do you know when a blonde has lost her virginity?

Her crayons are wet.

never thought the LNC would get 100 posts, not far to go

my fav joke apart from mine is i dont know forgot um all know

the dinner bell joke, and any swansea joke, and the granny blow job and tight rope one was tops

A teenager is walking through Swansea and a girl whispers to him, "Blowjob, five quid". He gives her a strange look and keeps walking. Soon another girl does the same thing. Confused, he keeps walking. The first thing out of his mouth when he returned home was "Mum, what's a blowjob?". His mom replies "Five quid, just like Swansea!".

A teenager is walking through Swansea and a girl whispers to him, "Blowjob, five quid". He gives her a strange look and keeps walking. Soon another girl does the same thing. Confused, he keeps walking. The first thing out of his mouth when he returned home was "Mum, what's a blowjob?". His mom replies "Five quid, just like Swansea!".

A teenager is walking through Swansea and a girl whispers to him, "Blowjob, five quid". He gives her a strange look and keeps walking. Soon another girl does the same thing. Confused, he keeps walking. The first thing out of his mouth when he returned home was "Mum, what's a blowjob?". His mom replies "Five quid, just like Swansea!".

bastards charged me a tenner !!

whats the diffrence between a cut up onion, and a cut up jack???

onions make me cry

Three nuns were talking. The first nun said, "I was cleaning in Father's room the other day and do you know what I found? A bunch of pornographic magazines." "What did you do?" the other nuns asked. "Well, of course I threw them in the trash." The second nun said, "Well, I can top that. I was in Father's room putting away the laundry and I found a bunch of condoms!" "Oh my!" gasped the other nuns. "What did you do?" they asked. "I poked holes in all of them!" she replied. The third nun fainted.

a swansea office worker phones his boss and says i cant come to work today im sick.
how sick are you?
well im currently banging my daughter

Q: What has 4 legs and one arm?
A: A Doberman in a playground