help needed

,,,, i have one of my nipples stuck in my zip of my jump suit any idea how i can get it out without to much pain.

post yourself to alaska and ask jeff the eskimo to sort it out,hes good like that

post yourself to alaska and ask jeff the eskimo to sort it out,hes good like that

,,,,, thanks moz is that jeff o brian the famous shells fan.who has a peg leg

[quote="mrs harry ramsgate"],,,, i have one of my nipples stuck in my zip of my jump suit any idea how i can get it out without to much pain. [/quote

Hang yourself upside down from a large sycamore tree, attach three ropes to the jumpsuit and at the end of the ropes

place three chelsea buns, after a short while some deers will appear, eat the chelsea buns thus pulling the ropes, releasing

the zipper from your nipple. Its a proven way of doing this and its foolproof. Your nipple maybe a touch tender after it

but I find a good handful of bombay mix and lard will allieviate your pain within two or three hours.

Hope this helps.

Dr Yes.

what if the deer are blind?

then they`l have no idea

what if the deer are blind?

then they`l have no idea

Mrs Ramsgate,

Would then have to rely on american timber wolves, its a known fact that they cannot go blind, and the simply adore

chelsea buns.

,,,,, thanks jbbj and moz. the problem has now been solved harry in his wisdom called the fire bragade and thay had my nipples out in a wink of an eye lid thay used the cyril berry tantric move of frozen two in one oil and brambly apple peel the only thing that was a bit painful was the tabasco sauce which thay got in my eye by accident(or so thay said but thay where the nasty sadistic type firemen and i think thay got it in my eye on purpose).

I heared u had a similar situation a few years back when u got ur big toe stuck up the bath tap , and to hide ur modestly Mr R discreetly placed a bowler hat to hide ur nether regions form the gazing eye of the would be plummer and his mate . On arrival the plumber said " I can remove ur toe in 2mins but cant do f**k all for Acker Bilk " !

I heared u had a similar situation a few years back when u got ur big toe stuck up the bath tap , and to hide ur modestly Mr R discreetly placed a bowler hat to hide ur nether regions form the gazing eye of the would be plummer and his mate . On arrival the plumber said " I can remove ur toe in 2mins but cant do f**k all for Acker Bilk " !

,,,,,, martyn you are as mad as a march hare you are not related to john bowens brother j are you.

I heared u had a similar situation a few years back when u got ur big toe stuck up the bath tap , and to hide ur modestly Mr R discreetly placed a bowler hat to hide ur nether regions form the gazing eye of the would be plummer and his mate . On arrival the plumber said " I can remove ur toe in 2mins but cant do f**k all for Acker Bilk " !

,,,,,, martyn you are as mad as a march hare you are not related to john bowens brother j are you.

no , never heared of him hope ur having a good day and lookin forward to ur birthday treat later ?

,,,,, thanks jbbj and moz. the problem has now been solved harry in his wisdom called the fire bragade and thay had my nipples out in a wink of an eye lid thay used the cyril berry tantric move of frozen two in one oil and brambly apple peel the only thing that was a bit painful was the tabasco sauce which thay got in my eye by accident(or so thay said but thay where the nasty sadistic type firemen and i think thay got it in my eye on purpose).

Ah the Cyril Berry tantric manouvre it never fails. I remember getting my ears stuck in a pencil sharpener once and the Cyril Berry was used on that occasion, okay I lost the use of my left ear, but at least I had my right one.

I do hope your birthday is going well, have you opened my suprise gift yet ?

,,,,, yes you met him in the boozer we where in for the play off final, he was dressed in a berka and was very very drunk.

,,,,, thanks jbbj and moz. the problem has now been solved harry in his wisdom called the fire bragade and thay had my nipples out in a wink of an eye lid thay used the cyril berry tantric move of frozen two in one oil and brambly apple peel the only thing that was a bit painful was the tabasco sauce which thay got in my eye by accident(or so thay said but thay where the nasty sadistic type firemen and i think thay got it in my eye on purpose).

Ah the Cyril Berry tantric manouvre it never fails. I remember getting my ears stuck in a pencil sharpener once and the Cyril Berry was used on that occasion, okay I lost the use of my left ear, but at least I had my right one.

I do hope your birthday is going well, have you opened my suprise gift yet ?

she is still taking the cream for the " gift " u gave her last year !

,,,,, thanks jbbj and moz. the problem has now been solved harry in his wisdom called the fire bragade and thay had my nipples out in a wink of an eye lid thay used the cyril berry tantric move of frozen two in one oil and brambly apple peel the only thing that was a bit painful was the tabasco sauce which thay got in my eye by accident(or so thay said but thay where the nasty sadistic type firemen and i think thay got it in my eye on purpose).

Ah the Cyril Berry tantric manouvre it never fails. I remember getting my ears stuck in a pencil sharpener once and the Cyril Berry was used on that occasion, okay I lost the use of my left ear, but at least I had my right one.

I do hope your birthday is going well, have you opened my suprise gift yet ?

she is still taking the cream for the " gift " u gave her last year !

Yes Martyn maybe with hindsight last years gift was a bit fooolish of me considering how contagious clamadia is. However there should be no such problems this year, as I have sent Mrs R a very well endowed donkey by the name of Gonzo. He`s a prize winning stud donkey and my vet assures me sex between Gonzo and Mrs Ramsgate will not result in any untoward or nasty sexual ailments. I only hope Harry won`t be jealous of Gonzo in anyway regarding his rather large appendage !!!

Harry's got a new banana to play with but Im sure if the ape mis behaves then he will give the monkey a good spanking ?

Harry's got a new banana to play with but Im sure if the ape mis behaves then he will give the monkey a good spanking ?

,,,,,, vintage and jbbj. i would be very happy to try your donkey and ape as promised i will film it and send it to you both very soon do you know any thing about snake dancing,

snake dancing was invented in august 2009 by a bored fish wrestler from krakov named finchkip-ballswater,upon realising he had struck gold he quickly sought to copyrite his discovery but was beaten to it by gavin rae,as a result any future dancing snakes should therefore apply directly to mr raes solicitor who is now known as dr gideon shit for details of performance commission rates

snake dancing was invented in august 2009 by a bored fish wrestler from krakov named finchkip-ballswater,upon realising he had struck gold he quickly sought to copyrite his discovery but was beaten to it by gavin rae,as a result any future dancing snakes should therefore apply directly to mr raes solicitor who is now known as dr gideon shit for details of performance commission rates

,,,, thanks moz,i had a funny feeling that dr gideon was a founder member of the snake dancing club but i did not know that about gavin ree.